Paphos People

Son: "Dad, we're learning about prisms at school. They're fascinating."
Dad: "That's good son, because as a dyslexic black boy, you're bound to end up in one."
Man walks into WH Smith and says "Do you have the new self-help book for men with really small dicks?"
Girl says "I don't think it's in yet"
He replies "Yeah, that's the one!"

Paddy said "In hindsight I should have posted my Facebook status as: "I've blown the head gasket on my 1997 XR3i" rather than "I've just buggered a 14 year old escort"!!!
The police still haven't seen the funny side, my lap top's been confiscated, and the wife has gone off to her mother.

A Muslim has been shot in the head with a starting pistol; police say
it's definitely race related...

Due to a water shortage in Ireland, Dublin swimming baths have
announced they are closing lanes 7 and 8....

Paddy got a letter from Screw Fix Direct thanking him for his interest, but
explaining they were not a dating agency...!!!!

Paddy thought his new girlfriend might be the one but after looking
through her knicker drawer and finding a nurse's outfit, a French maid's outfit, and a police woman's uniform, he finally decided if she can't hold down a job, she's not for him!!!

After 100 years lying on the sea bed, Irish divers were amazed to find
that the Titanic's swimming pool was still full!
Paddy decides to take up boxing and goes for the required medical. A few days later the doctor 'phones and says
"Paddy, you realise you've got sugar diabetes."
Paddy says, "Nice one, when do I fight him?"