Paphos People

-Weather forecast. The north of England will experience severe flooding over the next 24 hours. This is due to the whole of Scotland pouring themselves laughing.


-Fabio Capello was asked if he'll go 4-4-2 tonight, no I think we'll go 7-4-7 it's bigger and has more leg room


To English Fans; Feeling down and depressed about the football ? Think that your whole summer has been rui ned ? Then help is at hand. Call the official England supporters helpline free on 0800 4-1 4-1 4-1


-Heard that guy on death row in Utah got to choose his own firing squad. He chose Heskey, Gerrard, Lampard and Rooney.


-Following Anelka being sent home for abusing coach Raymond Domenech, 10,000 English supporters have contacted Capello to say they heard Heskey call him a bast*d!


-What's the difference, between a tea bag and the England team ? One stays in the cup longer !


-3 of the England team managed to land a punch on the angry supporter who broke into the changing room. Clear case of doodoo hitting the fan!


-Police have charged the man who entered the England dressing room with trespassing. 23 others have been charged with impersonating footballers.


-Breaking news! England has sig ned a new coach. It will pick them up on Sunday night & take them 2 the airport!