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 Post subject: Activities
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 12:48 pm 
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Rock Star

Joined: Mon Nov 05, 2012 11:30 pm
Posts: 1128
Location: Lincolnshire was Sea Caves & Cumbria
Hi,
As you know we came back to the UK in June and to be honest I think I made a mistake, no I did make a mistake, I want to come back but the wife is not too keen as I will explain.
It was her dream to come out in the first place but she found it lonely and is a little on the quite side till you get to know her, she will not openly go out to meet people in fear of rejection. She is 58 and needs someone to talk to not just me, to try help to convince her to come back I would like to ask the members of this site for help (Please).
What activities are there for people of her age where she can mix and get to know folk.
I will not be able to respond to replies due being away from my PC for a few days, if anyone wants to email me then feel free to do so.
Thanks in advance
Ian
Ps We all make mistakes in life, mine was not supporting my wife when she needed it, My fault, I think I am Human.


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 1:06 pm 
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Joined: Wed Feb 25, 2009 11:20 pm
Posts: 2032
Location: Tala
Hi

You don't say if your wife needs to work but, assuming that she doesn't, I would have thought that helping out in a charity shop, or with one of the animal charities would be a good way to start.

She would be meeting what are normally genuinely caring people without the usual ex-pat pastime of getting drunk! ;)


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 1:17 pm 
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Joined: Sat Oct 17, 2015 9:38 pm
Posts: 80
Location: Polemi
We have yet to make our move but one of the things I have noticed on here is the weekly walks - out in the countryside with people to talk to?


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 1:34 pm 
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Joined: Sat Aug 07, 2010 11:06 pm
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Location: Pegeia
You appear to have a Catch 22 situation.
You say “she will not openly go out to meet people in fear of rejection”
But they you ask “What activities are there for people of her age where she can mix and get to know folk.”
It’s a hard question to answer

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Dave
Moira And Dave

“I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.”


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 1:37 pm 
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Joined: Wed Feb 25, 2009 11:20 pm
Posts: 2032
Location: Tala
M.A.D wrote:
You appear to have a Catch 22 situation.
You say “she will not openly go out to meet people in fear of rejection”

That is why I suggested charity shops etc as everyone is there for a common cause (usually), so you are all on the same side to start with.

If it doesn't work out, just go and try another one.

Is she musical? If so there are various choral groups around.


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 2:32 pm 
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Joined: Mon Nov 16, 2009 1:12 am
Posts: 279
Location: Tala
I really think the volunteering suggestion would help your wife. It would give her something to do which was valuable and positive rather than just trying to fill in the hours.
At 58 she is still of working age, so if her health is OK I would strongly recommend becoming a volunteer. That way she will have 'colleagues' who may also become friends. If they don't, it doesn't matter, the upside is that she will be doing something worthwhile, and being appreciated is a great confidence builder.
We are just completing our longest trial stay out here, just the two of us, and it has gone brilliantly but that's mainly because it was time limited so still feels like a very long holiday.
Whe you make a permanent move, it's a different thing to get your head round. You tend to miss home, the people and the things, more because absence really does make the great grow fonder!
We've moved around a lot over many years, with children and without, and it always takes some adjusting to. I wish you and your wife all the very best whatever you decide.

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Pat


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 3:01 pm 
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Joined: Fri Oct 03, 2008 10:00 am
Posts: 3626
Location: Sea Caves darlings!, Peyia actually!
Have sent you a PM.

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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 3:46 pm 
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Regular

Joined: Wed Jan 16, 2013 9:53 pm
Posts: 277
Location: Konia
How about ten pin bowling or crown green bowls?
I recently joined a ten pin bowling league and you could not find a more friendly, inclusive group of people.

There are also gyms eg Spa Tonic, where the clientele can be more mature, no muscle bound gym junkies. You could also have a nice swim all year round there and there's usually someone keen to chat.

Good luck to you both, whatever you decide.


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 3:56 pm 
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Joined: Tue Nov 17, 2009 10:22 am
Posts: 844
My wife initially found it very difficult when she moved to Cyprus due to the culture change and having no friends.

She started Greek lessons and then became involved in the Yoga classes down on Lunar beach which are three mornings a week. She then started Ballroom and then Greek dancing and Salsa and even Belly Dancing. The best of all though is Dancercise which she does a couple of times a week at the Crown Resorts in Coral Bay. The people involved in Dancercise are from 30 to 70 plus and my wife really enjoys it; most of the group are British though there are several foreign ladies like my wife. Dancercise is run by a lady called Ali and they hold all sorts of social events, you don't have to be fit, just enthusiastic. Since joining all these activity groups the wife has made lots of good and close friends who are always calling round at our place or out having coffee somewhere or other.

Jim


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 5:03 pm 
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Major

Joined: Mon Aug 01, 2011 3:22 pm
Posts: 120
It's difficult to suggest activities for someone without knowing what their interests are but I think that the suggestion about volunteering is a very good way of easing yourself into a new group of people - there are so many charities desperate for more help which would ensure a warm welcome from the start and she could choose one that was in relation to something that was of interest or of concern to her.

Volunteers may not necessarily want to get involved in the day to day hands-on work of the charity and can instead just help out with the fundraising activities or with something on the administration side. For example, as my user name suggests I am involved with PARC and among other things I am directly involved in getting out and catching feral cats for neutering BUT we also desperately need more people to help us when we hold our monthly table top sales - whether it is simply coming along for an hour or two to help get everything out of boxes or staying for the whole time and helping with the selling.

Whatever you both decide to do I wish you all the best of luck

Sue


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 8:12 pm 
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Joined: Wed Jan 16, 2008 5:04 pm
Posts: 1589
Location: Limassol, Cyprus
Rather than looking for activities for your wife, it would perhaps be a better idea to find something you can both join in especially if she isn't very outgoing on her own as you indicate.

Then if she's happy enough and has found some kind of a social life she may find there are other related activities with some of the members she's met and may well be prepared to try some of them alone with friends you've both met along the way.

Or, is there something that keeps you from both doing "stuff" together?

Certainly, the flat mat bowling in Paphos has a steady following and they pop over from time to time to the "green" near where we live on the Limassol side (Aphrodite Club Bowls in Erimi village).

What about "hashing" - are there any groups there in Paphos (if you're both interested in walking and socialising) perhaps?

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Shell


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2015 9:32 am 
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Joined: Mon Oct 05, 2009 10:38 pm
Posts: 178
Would you be able to have a dog or two? They are great company (mine talk a lot of sense!) and enable you to meet like minded dogs and their humans? Possibly you could foster one ...


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2015 6:56 pm 
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Major

Joined: Tue May 01, 2012 11:55 pm
Posts: 144
Location: Polemi
both of you could joined P3A Paphos 3rd age it has lots of activities


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Sun Dec 06, 2015 3:00 pm 
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Rock Star

Joined: Mon Nov 05, 2012 11:30 pm
Posts: 1128
Location: Lincolnshire was Sea Caves & Cumbria
Hello,
Thank you for all the replies and thanks to those who PM me, taken on board what was said and to be honest it was a very big help so much so we will be back in May.
Again thank you
Ian


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 Post subject: Re: Activities
PostPosted: Sun Dec 06, 2015 3:27 pm 
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Top of the pops

Joined: Wed Feb 25, 2009 11:20 pm
Posts: 2032
Location: Tala
Result!

:congrats


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